He was jonesing for some action
Thinking ‘bout attraction between two dudes was getting him down
So he made a sign to picket, to tell them where to stick it
And he headed for the gay part of town

It was his lucky day, they were on parade
Strutting to the national mall
He shouted “God hates fags,” but then a man in drag said,
“How ya doing? My name is Paul.”
And he made him reconsider it all
Mike finally answered the call

Mike Pence at the gay pride parade
He came for the protest but dick’s why he stayed
Waving a flag and wearing a thong
He used to think being a homo was wrong
But he changed his tune
When a man in leather made him swoon
Mike Pence, Mike Pence, Mike Pence
At the gay pride parade

You might think he was nerdy, you wouldn’t think he’s dirty,
He seems to have a stick up his ass
You couldn’t tell at the election, but seeing his erection,
You’d know he wants a dick up his ass

He got up on a float, he won the popular vote
To be King of the Washington Gays
In his acceptance speech, he began to preach
About the urges he had back in the days
When his homo fire started to blaze
And now he knows it wasn’t a phase

Mike Pence at the gay pride parade
He came with his wife but now he’s getting laid
With a drag queen in the back of a van
Now he’s quoting Obama: “Yes we can!”
With Paul on top
Mike on the bottom shouting “no don’t stop”
Mike Pence, Mike Pence, Mike Pence,
at the gay pride parade

Things were getting nutty, he ran into some buddies
Conservative leaders were whipping out their wieners
He saw Ted Cruz dancing on a pole
If you’re looking for a twink buy Jeff Sessions a drink
He had to bring Karen and the Lezzies were staring
He went Republican Style ‘till he looked ‘cross the aisle
And Bernie made him lose control (Feel the Bern!)

Mike Pence at the gay pride parade
Suckin’ a dick till it spews lemonade
Wearing a pearl necklace and having a ball
He can’t wait to start his future with Paul

Plot twist: it’s Paul Ryan!!!
Glory Hallelujah!!!
Modulation
Glory HOLE-e-lujah!!!

They’re painting rainbows on Capitol Hill
And Mike’s so in love that he’s signing a bill
To say that God loves him
And being gay is not a sin

Mike Pence, Mike Pence, Mike Pence,
It makes sense he likes men,
His butthole is not tense,
He consents to gay sex,
He likes pecs and thick necks,
He’s spicy like tex mex,
He found love
Now what’s next for Mike Pence,
Mike Pence
At the gay pride parade